Suffering From Depression? Do You Think……..my Friends Son Is Suffering From Manic Depression,could Be?
Posted by: Alan in Manic Depression, tags: Depression, Depressioncould, Friends, From, Manic, Suffering, Think........my
Bipolar, we have all tried without sucess,to convince him he needs councelling and anti-depressants to help him get through this.This he consistantly denies will help with the way he feels.This has gone on for years,but getting worse by the day.He lives alone,and is so sad all the time,I know he constantly thinks of suicide,His parents are reluctant to say the least to section him. I know he has had failed relationships and now feels totally un-loveable,obviously another symptom of the depression.However,I’ve been thinking what can possibly be done to help him.I know he absolutely adores animals,especially dogs,he often looks after his friends dog.Do you think a dog would help? Someone to love,someone to love him,be there for him,make him go out,give him some incentive to want to go on for.I have written about him before on this site as has is mum.Just got to think of something, what do you think,could it help?
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December 25th, 2009 at 8:45 pm
He actually does not sound bi-polar. Manic depression is called manic depression for a reason, there are periods of extreme highs (may not sleep for days, gets easily excited and or agitated, has an insane amount of energy etc.) followed by periods of extreme depression. Some manic depressives rapid cycle (having periods of manias and periods of depression in short burts, a small number even cycle between the two a few times each day) but the majority of manics tend to stay in a depression for a few weeks or months and then in a mania for a few weeks. If he was suffering from a Mania you would know it. He would be showing behaviors such as -but not limited to- incessant talking, not sleeping, spending or driving eradically, starting major projects or undertakings for seemingly no reason (often not finishing them before a depression hits) not stopping to eat, jitteryness etc.
Your friends son soundss more like he stays in a depression constantly. This behavior can be the result of a severe clinical depression that got out of hand due to lack of medication/counseling. Regardless of the kind of depression, he really does need professional help, try and talk him into just talking to a psychologist….remind him a psychologist can’t prescribe meds so he wont have to worry about them pressuring him into those. Maybe that will be a good enough compromise for him.
A dog may help to cheer him up temporarily, but the sad reality is depression is a disorder due to chemical imbalances in the brain, it exists in a person despite how many people or pets they have to show love and affection. If love and affection were enough to cure depression completely, there would be a lot less homeless pets and a lot more homeless shrinks.
The other problem with a dog is that if this man really would be bipolar, sometimes in a mania people will do things they do not normally do. Some become violent, others may take off and go on a out of the blue road trip-leaving said animal alone possibly to fend for itself- do not kid yourself that he wouldn’t do that. The truth is you don’t know what he is capable of if he gets manic enough or even depressed enough.
It is better to urge him to seek professional help than to think you can cure his illness with love.
btw- i never said urging him to seek counsling would convince him to try it, just that it’s the only thing that really can be done. I would assume that if you are friends with his parents that would make him a friend too, and who turns their back on a friend in a situation like that? A heartless rock?
December 25th, 2009 at 11:04 pm
I don’t think he is bipolar from what you say, although I’m no psychiatrist. However I know that having a dog can be a great companion, so that might help. It sounds like he really needs more good friends to me.
December 26th, 2009 at 5:06 am
Show him the websites below and let him decide what course of action to take…he may resent someone who is not credentialled trying to diagnose his mental well-being.
There are tests that may be administered by a general physician (M.D.) that can determine whether the condition is severe enough to seek specialized treatment. As for your belief that he is suicidal, have you considered having a check-up? Projection is one type of defense mechanism that may reveal a negative mental tendency. Leave the actual diagnosis to the professionals, though. Self-help is not strongly recommended in severe cases.
Take care..be well.
December 26th, 2009 at 11:30 am
havent got a clue if it will work but liken the idea about the dog could be the answer.
December 26th, 2009 at 2:46 pm
Psychatristic consultation weill definately help.
I underwent the pain of depression, anxiety, stress, trauma, panic attacks, for a length of 15 long years. I know what the pain is. Not only physically, but the suffering to the family, friends, co workers too. Slowly the doctor got my mind atlered to an almost normal state, by use of different drugs, then slowly redcuing to the current minimum maintenance dose, as precaution to relapse.
Find a good doctor, treat him like a normal person, dont overadvise him. and try:http://www.wendi.com
December 26th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
i could help him, worth a go anyway it doesnt sound a bad idea at all to me.
Wish i had, had a friend like you when i was like that.
December 26th, 2009 at 6:50 pm
try the dog but also a therapist. get him to see one at metanoia.org. or a regular doc.
December 26th, 2009 at 9:16 pm
Dog is a good idea. I had a dog myself and it was magical. it’s encourage to keep a very fit lifestyle. Just get him choose it
December 27th, 2009 at 2:36 am
Yes it sounds just the kind of thing he does need to give meaning to his life and to give him companionship but is he competent to look after a dog 24/7. If so what a great gift for him, maybe even let him chooses the dog so he can find one he bonds with
December 27th, 2009 at 2:53 am
It does not sound like bi-polar affective disorder, but rather a deep depression. Mania, although usually a pleasurable experience for the sufferer, can have a devestating impact on a persons life. What makes it quite unique is that the sufferer often does not realise that they are experiencing an abnormal mood, but that they just feel elated. In addition to this there are many other symptoms, racing and speeded up thoughts, which in turn leads to rapid thinking and hurried talking. The sufferer may also present with unchararistic behaviours such as, over spending, reckless driving, affairs, drinking excessively and drug taking. They may also walk with a sense of urgency and everthing is done against the clock. The rapid thinking often leads the sufferer to not sleep at bedtime as their mind races and buzzes with thoughts and ideas, which usually are unrealstic. They may also jump from one idea to another and not be able to concentrate on one task at once. Their judgement becomes increasingly blinded and, in extreme cases the individual loses touch with reality, and they may believe that they are a famous person, or somebody with a level of significant importance, and their need for self importance expands. Believing that they are superior to everybody else you are unable to rationalise with a person experiecing a manic episode, as the individual has the false belief that they are right. Thus, this can lead to aggression, irritability and restlessness. There is also a new appreciation for art, religion and music. Colours and shapes become almost magical. In the early stages of the cycle these symptoms may well go unnoticed, and diagnosis doesn’t usually occur until a disaster strikes.
Depression on the otherhand is usually the opposite of this. The person will usually have know energy, sleep for long periods of time and become unmotivated and disinterested in life. They may lack confidence and self esteem, have extreme agitation and anxiety which can lead to social isolation. Because the sufferer usually may have quite an active life he/she may begin to cut off contact with friends and daily activities. This is the cycle of dpression as the more isolated one becomes the worse the depression becomes. They may also stop eating or have a reduced appetite, thus leading to quite extreme weight loss. Other symptoms include,slowed thinking with poor concentration, loss of progression leading to apathy. Conversation usually turns to silence, and it can be really hard to talk to somebody who is feeling that way. The sufferer may also have thoughts of suicide and self harming , and feel worthless to those around him.This is dangerous in itself, as it may lead the sufferer to act upon these feelings.
As for getting him a dog, I don’t think that would be such a good idea at the moment, as primarily he is struggling to look after himself and he may find the responsibility to difficult to take on. My advice is that firstly, you get him to the Docters, who can make an initial diagnosis and then asked to be refered to a community mental health team within your area so that he can have a full assessment. He may not need to be sectioned at this point and they will probably prescribe him medication, and see how it goes. In the mean time be gentle with him. Maybe you could just meet him for coffee and pop around to see him. Ask him if there is anything he would like to do. Take a walk together. As the medication begins to work he may feel able to do more and more, and you can support him with it. Eventually when he is feeling well enough he may become interested in doing some voluntary work or a small part time course. But, please get him some help soon as depression left untreated can also turn into psychosis. Sometimes when somebody is suffering from a mental illness, you just need to intervene, and when the person is well they will understand why you did it. Y ou are dealing with a very difficult situation and I would like to wish the all the best. There are a couple of websites which are really good. You will have to google them as can’t remember their address. Type in manic depression fellowship
Mind
Rethink
saneline
They will be able to give you furthur information and advice about what to do.
December 27th, 2009 at 2:54 am
If it’s your friend’s son, then I suggest you BUTT OUT. Mind your business, or you’ll only make things worse. You can’t “help” him or “cheer him up.” Back off NOW, and let him and his family work it out. And I don’t really care how “close” you are to him and his family. IT DOESN’T MATTER – MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
Love, Jack.
PS And I don’t really care if some people who say they are “experts.” “Urging him to seek counseling” is BS – she SAID they already tried.
December 27th, 2009 at 3:36 am
Perhaps you could also get him involved in some volunteer work for the local animal shelter. I know the shelters are always looking for people to walk dogs, play with them, things like that, because there are so many unwanted animals. If you can get him doing that, not only does he get to associate with the animals, he will be dooing a great social service for the community. He might even find a dog there he likes.