Depression Treatment Care

I just turned 23 years old and have suffered from major depression for about 4-5 years. My father passed away at 16 years old and I have never really been the same. I have been diagnosed with manic depression, g.a.d, panic disorder and bi-polar type two. Most of the time I feel that I have a good head on my shoulders but do lack energy and concentration wich can really hinder ones ability to function correctly. I also have an extreme amount of anxiety. I run at least 8-10 miles a week and meditate (although maybe not enough) wich helps but doesnt suffice. I choose not to take ssri’s because they make me feel like im a robot that just drifts threw life feeling relatively the same way all the time. Again I am looking to find a natural remedy for lack of energy, concentration, and releif of anxiety. Please do not suggest any type of religion. Thank you..
Yes the depression started 2 years after my dad died. Also my anxiety isnt about stress it is the feeling that death is coming numerous times a day, and before you say we all die I know that it doesnt help.
im such an idiot ahah my father passed away when i was 16 years old.. wow did i screw that up,.

Im lazy because i take medication for a type of manic depression (severe ultradian bipolar)
I got a 23 on my ACT 24 on the math ,22 on english ,20 on writing ,and 24 on the science

I know someone who has been suffering from major depression for many years and is continually trying different treatment options, but nothing seems to work? Is there even a cure at all?
Does anyone have any kind of statistics?

This is a general question, asking for some “Natural” ways to overcome depression and anxiety. I know that there are prescription drugs you can take so I don’t need any advice on that. But are there any sleeping methods, or good things to eat or drink, etc. to get over anxiety and depression

I have been having depressive episodes between about every few weeks and every few months for five years, but i don’t think I have ever been manic or hypomanic. Is there a disorder where you get have recurring major depression but is not bipolar disorder? And what would cause something like this?